I want a business card with a frazzled ass pic of me -- you know the early Christmas Morning oh crap breakfast is burning and we forgot the batteries for the gifts from Santa and I only got 1.5 hrs of sleep and I'm hungover from the eggnog last night -- that way when I hand out the cards, it won't matter how bad I look, it will be better than the card! I also want some smart ass content... rather than "LISA D---, Noah, Violet, Ruby, and Henry's Mom, with a picture of each of her kids in the corners, a fancy border, and her phone number and email address" -- I want MOMUMO, still yelling at S, D, & K about the same stuff in their teens that I was yelling about when they were 8 -- and then instead of pics of them, I think maybe pictures of their rooms. I also (as you will see if you read my comment to Baseballmom) want to put bullets on the back...
*"mother of a college student that still eats with her mouth open"
*"mother of the class smartass"
*"I do have two other children, that's why you don't always see me at dance/baseball/swimming/dr's appts"
*"no, I haven't seen that important memo, I'm sure it's in one of the backpacks and I will try to remember to ask tonight"
*"No I didn't get your telephone message, do you have my cell phone number?"
Please feel free to make other suggestions you think would be both amusing and accurate... I am so in love with this idea I can barely contain myself to get back to my "day job"!
1 comment:
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! You took what I had, and made it better...I could get way creative with the card ideas...how 'bout "I didn't answer the phone because I don't give a fuck what you have to say" for starters! Or, "You're not as important as you think you are". Heh.
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